Why Relationship and Sex Education?

At Constellation Workshops we believe that love and intimacy is for everybody, and that healthy sexuality is a natural part of the human experience. Healthy emotionally intimate relationships, whether they include sexual intimacy or not, have the power to foster joy, creativity, and companionship, things that we no doubt all wish for ourselves and those we care about. This is no less true for people with intellectual and developmental disabilities (IDD). People with IDD often do not receive even the most minimal sex education (both at school and at home), generally in an honest but misguided attempt to protect them from the complexities and dangers of adult life. What we know, however, is that adult life happens regardless, and without a basic understanding of their anatomy, romantic feelings, relationships, and self-advocacy skills, adults with IDD are often left without guidance through these complicated waters. The unfortunate truth is that our loved ones with IDD are also left vulnerable to violence and exploitation. One 2018 study found that “People with intellectual disabilities are sexually assaulted at a rate seven times higher than those without disabilities” (1). Another found that 49% of people with intellectual disabilities will experience 10 or more sexually abusive incidents in their lifetime (2). These deeply disturbing numbers point to a world in which people with IDD are specifically targeted for this type of violence, often because they are seen as lacking credibility or the ability to communicate or understand what has happened. Rather than sheltering folks from sex education, then, it is important to make sure they have the information that they need to stay safe, build vibrant and fulfilling relationships, and understand the steps to take if someone hurts them.

If we don’t know how to talk about our bodies and experiences, then we won’t. If we don’t know about consensual human sexuality, then we have no way to know when we are being exploited or hurt. If we don’t know about healthy love then we have no way of knowing the difference between that and violence. The goal of our workshops are to provide participants with a comprehensive understanding of their bodies, a vocabulary to talk about their experiences, and the confidence to safely take control of their romantic and sexual lives.